Document 21H: "Miss Lucy Stone's Temperance Convention," The [N.Y.] Weekly Herald, September 3, 1853, p. 285.

[p. 285]

    Miss LUCY STONE'S TEMPERANCE CONVENTION --FIRST DAY.--Miss Lucy Stone's "Whole World's Temperance Convention" is "a hit--a palpable hit." She was not to be put down by that exclusive set of men last spring, who decided that the women and the darkies should have nothing to do with the "World's Temperance Convention" for September the 6th--not she. The result is, that she leads the way with an independent Temperance Convention. inviting "all the world and his wife,"--black, red, yellow, and white, to mingle together on the same platform. It will be seen, however, that the principal ingredients of Miss Lucy's omnium gatherum are chosen from among the most notorious humbugs, infidels, socialists, and abolitionists of the day--of women too fast for the slow progress of the Christian dispensation; and of men entirely too big for their breeches. Vide Greeley and his boots.

    The speeches yesterday and last night, as will be seen from our report of the proceedings of this singular Maine law movement, were all well enough in their way, and sufficiently eloquent upon the great subjects of cold water and women's rights, though nothing strikingly new or important has yet been disclosed. The Convention will probably proceed to practical business to-day, and great things may be expected, for H. Greeley, C. C. Sholes, Lucy Stone, C. C. Burleigh, and Dr. Harriet K. Hunt, constitute the business committee. Barnum and Lucretia Mott are among the Vice Presidents. For the honor thus conferred upon Barnum, we think that at the close of the convention he ought to invite all the delegates to a treat in some one of those refectories under his museum. The old "Terrapin Lunch." and the "Live and Let Live." have always a good supply of liquors on hand. Now, by-the-bye, why should not "the Bearded Lady" be invited into the convention as the delegate from Switzerland? Having taken pretty strong grounds against man's monopoly of the whiskers, we think she ought to be sustained by Miss Lucy and all the champions of woman's rights. Our idea is that the Bearded Lady ought to be made President of this convention, or the forth-coming Woman's Rights Convention, par excellence, at all events. If she hasn't got the breeches she has got the beard. Let Miss Lucy Stone call the attention of Barnum to this deserving person, without delay. She is a living illustration of that great maxim of Sam Patch, that "some things can be done as well as others." We do trust that her claims will be enforced by Miss Lucy this very day.

    Let the world look sharp for the result of this day's doings in the convention. The business committee we have named, are almost certain to do something on a grand scale. Perhaps they may give us an independent Maine Liquor Law Woman's Right Abolition State ticket, in co-operation with the committee on platforms and resolutions. The world does move, after all Old Galileo was right.

Take your time, Miss Lucy,
And make the coffee strong."

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